Category Archives: Aussie Tales

Statistically speaking

Dad used to take us out hunting. To him it was quality time for boys to become men. I can’t say I enjoyed it and neither did my brother. It was great seeing nature’s beauty in the great outdoors but … Continue reading

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You’re next!

When there were weddings in the family and I had to attend, I would hurredly have to find a partner. It was embarrassing because there are two old aunts in our family who think their role in the family is … Continue reading

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Congratulations on your move

Mum and Dad were farmers but when the motorway went through, it carved a large slice off the farm, so they sold it and after a short course, became real estate agents. Whenever they sold a house, they would go … Continue reading

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It’s a simply matter of intelligence.

When I was in my twenties and had just finished three gruelling years of study at uni, I decided it was time to see a bit of the world – no more late nights spent cramming for exams. I decided … Continue reading

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It’s not heaven when . . .

When Grandpa passed away, we were sitting on the veranda after the service and Aunt Katie, the black sheep of the family, asked,” I wonder if Alf in is Heaven or Hell?” We all looked at her stunned and Dad … Continue reading

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Jumping posts and tree stumps

Being single and new to Melbourne, I knew no-one. I decided to try meeting people by answering those “Personal Ads” that appear in the local paper. Many were probably weirdos but surely there had to be a few relatively normal … Continue reading

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Marketing Jargon – Avian relocation

I recently had to sit through a management meeting of marketing executives. Their goal was to increase the number of products sold so the company would make more money. There were so many buzz words, acronyms and gobbledegook going around … Continue reading

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Overheard in a classy establishment

When my brother was going through University, he worked evenings in a high class hotel bar. We used to look forward to him coming home every weekend. He always had some great tale that would leave us laughing. Because it … Continue reading

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Ol’Jess steak and mushrooms

Mum was a regular church goer and they had this thing going where a group of wives took turns to cook lavish dinners once a month. It came round to Mum’s turn and since we had just butchered one of … Continue reading

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The Hogmanay Taxi

Hamish McPherson, our neighbour, was a burly Scotsman who was very proud of his ancestry. Whilst you wouldn’t call him an alcoholic, he was known to over indulge occasionally. You’d know because he’d get out his bagpipes and toture all … Continue reading

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